Could Serial Marriage Become the Norm in America?

April 2, 2008

Image credit: Amanda RhodeDid you catch the Barbara Walters special last night? It was entitled, Live to 150, Can You Do It? and featured a number of very interesting facts about how life span is extending well past 100. In fact, there are 84,000 people over 100 now and its said to be the fastest growing segment of the population.<p><P>

Live to 150, Can You Do It?

Barbara Walters hosted a special last night by the same title. It explored the amazing discoveries scientists are making about how to extend our livespans. Growing a new heart used to be science fiction, but now it’s being done in the lab. The show implied that in the future we’ll be able to trade up for new parts just like fixing the car. My swubby insisted on switching between that and the Celtics game (the man has his priorities). Personally, I found the program a bit disappointing and misleading. Why? A couple of reasons that I’m happy to share.

Old is Beautiful

First reason, the program felt more like a condemnation of aging than a joyous celebration of the wisdom and virtues that we accrue with age. We need every year we have alive to grow into our best selves. And if that’s true, then, the more years the better, I say. But I guess more people side with Ben Franklin who said, “All would live long but none would be old.”

The Dorian Gray Effect

Remember the story of Dorian Gray? He was a young man who traded his soul so that he could stay young and beautiful while his picture aged. That’s the other reason I didn’t care for the show. The subtext said ‘whatever it takes to stay young’. The interviews with the couple that practice calorie restriction and the man who takes skads of supplement pills daily were particularly filled with a grim determination.

I’m all for exercise and good diet to stay in shape and prolong my active years, but that was too much. In case anyone has forgotten death is not optional. No matter how hard we work to add more years, eventually there is an end. And, personally, I say amen to that. End of rant.

Serial Marriage

Back to my favorite topic: marriage. The part of the program that really caught my attention was near the end when they posited a few guesses about romance and marriage at over 100. According to Barbara, when longevity extends people may turn to serial marriages. That means you might have one partner for each life phase: young adulthood, adulthood, mature adulthood and centenarian- that’s over 100.

Crazy idea, huh? Especially when you consider we already practice of form of serial marriage. It’s called divorce and remarriage. And, there used to be a stigma about being married too many times, especially for women who may be judged as unstable or floosies as my Gram would say. Maybe it won’t matter because all your friends will be on their sixth marriage, too, if they live that long!

Speak Your Mind

As always, I’m pretty curious to hear what people think about multiple marriages and about having a single 100 year marriage to the same person. I’m gonna reach out to some friendly bloggers who inhabit the marriage/boomer space to get their thoughts. Boomer Chronicles, GenPlus, Building Camelot, The Marriage Conversation Blog – what do you think???

Enjoy this post? Here are some more posts we think you might like:
Do You Avoid Fighting with your Spouse?
Which is Harder: Getting or Keeping a Spouse?
Happy Loving Day!

If you like this post, please subscribe | Posted by Dina

Comments

5 Responses to “Could Serial Marriage Become the Norm in America?”

  1. Tyler @ Building Camelot on April 3rd, 2008 1:46 am

    I didn’t get to see the special you’re talking about. You bring up some good points that I’ve never thought about.

    Living a long time doesn’t scare me - what scares me is being old and not being myself. If I live to be >100 I want to have my wits about me and be somewhat independent.

    I agree that with age comes wisdom and character. You can learn a great deal from your elders - massive and massive amounts of knowledge are being lost when our elders die.

    I’m not sure about the serial marriage thing. People change as they get older but what’s the point of getting a divorce and getting remarried when your 98 years old?

  2. cory huff on April 4th, 2008 2:52 am

    If I live to be over 100, and my wife lives close to that long, I don’t think I would remarry. The thought makes me shudder.

  3. Dina on April 4th, 2008 2:27 pm

    Shutter…interesting. It’s a tough question to wrap one’s mind around. I wonder what someone a little more advanced in age would say?

    Boomers, jump right in and answer. d

  4. Janet Wendy Spiegel on April 6th, 2008 2:58 am

    At 48, I’m already so stuck in my ways, I’m not sure how malleable I could be in a marriage. I’m guessing that by the time I’m in my 90’s, I’ll be very entrenched in my “own” way of doing things…even if I had the desire to be married, would I want to? Or would I have a 100 year old boyfriend that stays over several nights a week. Would my kids be living on their own? Or would they have moved back in with me after being divorced at 65? So many issues to look at…just in the relationship arena alone!

  5. Dina Lynch Eisenberg on April 7th, 2008 2:46 pm

    That ‘rebounding kid thing’ is amazing isn’t it. I’m not sure whether to be scared, mad, sad or all three. One of my swubby’s employees who is in his late 40’s lives with his parents and one of his brothers. I thought it was an anomaly, but I guess it’s a trend. Yikes!

Got something to say?