Book Review: Smart Women Break Free
July 16, 2008 | 1 Comment
I remember the old days when my mother went through ‘the change’. It was a mysterious time when our whole household was in flux, and everyone knew to stay out of my mother’s way. My thoughts about midlife and retirement were created in that chaos.
At twenty, I thought it would be a sad time filled with frustrations, just a lonely waiting period until death. At the ripened age of 46, things look a lot different. I made the mind-shift on my own, but I’m glad there are books like Smart Women Don’t Retire- They Break Free to guide others.
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What role does loyalty play in marriage?
Would You Marry Again if Widowed?
Would You Marry Again if Widowed?
March 26, 2008 | 2 Comments
Interesting question because I have so many different role models to choose from. My father-in-law, Herb, hasn’t let death or divorce keep him from being married, his natural state. My mom, on the other hand, wouldn’t take vows again for a million dollars. She says she’s done caring for men.
Karma Kitja posted a terrific question on her blog: Women Only: Who Wants Committment? I couldn’t resist asking the same question here. There’s a lot wrapped up into it.
Marrying a Third Time
I don’t think I’d marry again. It would be hard to top what I have now. Besides, learning a whole new person- their likes, dislikes, attitudes and moods sound more like work than fun. But I do think I’d want companionship for dinner and travel. And, that doesn’t have to come attached to a penis.
Ladies, would you marry again in your bonus years?
Guys, feel free to answer, too. I’m betting more men say yes.
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Is Marriage An Incurable Virus?
How About Renewing Your Marriage License just like your car registration?
Do You See Yourself Retiring?
March 3, 2008 | 3 Comments
My dad dreamed of his retirement. He worked over 30 years as a custodian, but in his heart, he was an entrepreneur and traveler. We spent long evenings talking about how he’d finally launch his hot dog truck or what towns we’d stop in during our RV trip across the country. He saved his most precious goals for his golden years. Only he never reached them. He died at 57, one month after he took early retirement. What a shame.
Given that history, I want to start my ‘transition’ a bit earlier. That’s what I call the journey I’m on now- my transition. I don’t think I’ll ever retire in the traditional sense of the word. I won’t stop working because it fulfills me and I need the money for life’s pleasures like travel and great food.
Retiring would be a disaster. I find it hard not to do something for 15 minutes let alone relaxing for 15-20 years! I don’t know about you, but I really like learning new things and being active. I stay current and I think that helps my outlook (and mind) stay youthful. In fact, my kids joke that I’ll have to live forever to accomplish all the projects I want to start (there’s the cookbook for college men, a blog for multiracial people, a magazine swap-meet…)
And, I’m not alone! Many boomers are starting a second act. Statistics suggest that 80% of boomers don’t plan on retiring at 62. That’s astonishing, don’t you think? According to an NY Times interview with Marc Freedman, the founder of Experience Corps and Civic Ventures, millions of boomers will begin to develop second careers, which he calls encore careers. We’re using our experience and expertise to drive businesses and social causes that enable us to give back and to look ahead with optimism.
This Marriage Thing blog is officially my encore career. It’s a great plan because I can do the things I love most: read, learn, and communicate wherever I am in the world and with a lot of flexibility. Although I haven’t done it yet, I envision blogging from the beach in Madrid, or sharing my experiences on a cooking vacation to Thailand. It could happen and it will.
What do you want to do in the bonus years?
PS Thinking about starting a business? I plan on talking about that in a later post. For now, check out Civic Ventures. It’s a business incubator for folks over 50. And, consider attending the What’s Next Boomer Business Summit It’s a unique opportunity to network and get ideas. The early bird rate is available until March 5th
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